Never Let Go
by SpiritedQuill
Summary: Anonymous prompted: "I'm never going to let you go." Blaine doesn't know how to let go, so he gets help from the one person who he never thought he'd have to say goodbye to. Ghost!Kurt. Angst, angst, angst, and more angst. Warnings inside fic.
1. Chapter 1

Anonymous prompted from a tumblr prompt meme: "I'm never going to let you go." I changed the prompt just a little and I didn't use that exact sentence, but I hope it turned out okay, albeit a little (read: a lot) sad. Anyway, have some Klaine! Warnings for character death and implications/mentions of assault. Also ghost!Kurt.

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_"Kurt! Kurt, _please _wake up. Please, I need you. No… No, no, no, no, _no!" _Blaine heard the sound of approaching sirens but he knew deep down it was too late. He collapsed over Kurt's lifeless body and sobbed, clinging to the last strand of hope although he knew it'd snapped the first time he checked Kurt's pulse. _

Blaine gasped as he shot into a sitting position, tangled up in blankets and covered in sweat. His head throbbed and he groaned, tapering off into a whimper as he curled up under the blankets once more. He tried to bend into a fetal position but cried out through gritted teeth when his recently-broken rib jostled. He was miserable. Injured and miserable and, worst of all, alone.

He forced himself out of bed, padding into the kitchen and holding his aching torso as if he could pull himself back together by sheer force of will. He reached up into the cupboard for the pain medicine and took two pills before making his way to the couch. He sat down and turned on some mindless television for white noise, staring at the dull wall behind the screen. He felt empty, despite the physical pain. He felt nothing but numbness and residual terror after his latest nightmare.

"You need to get some sleep," a soft, angelic voice said from behind him. Blaine startled, turning around too quickly and whimpering at the pain it caused his ribs. But when he looked behind him, there was no one there. He frowned, thinking he must be going insane in his solitude. He returned to his original position and tried to calm himself down.

"Blaine, please stop doing this," the voice said again, this time coming from directly to his right, but when he looked there was nothing.

Blaine's heart started to race anxiously and he stood up, wincing, and looked around the apartment. "Hello? Who's there? There's nothing worth stealing here, so please just… leave. I won't call the cops, I swear." He called out into the silence, feeling a cold sensation nudging at the back of his neck. He shivered, letting out a halted gasp as his ribs ached once again. "Whoever you are, please don't hurt me," he said in a weak voice.

"I would never hurt you." There was the voice again, right in front of him. Startled, he looked up, his heart skipping a beat at what he saw. "Blaine, please don't freak out… You'll only hurt yourself more."

"You… But I saw… You were… _Kurt," _he exclaimed, his voice rising in pitch with each word. He couldn't get his breathing to calm down and each breath sent searing pain through his torso, bringing tears to his eyes.

"Blaine, honey," Kurt—was it really Kurt?—said, looking worried. "Please calm down. I promise I'll explain, just… sit down. Please."

Blaine calmed a bit at the soothing ring of Kurt's voice, sinking down to the couch and staring up at his deceased fiancé in shock and disbelief. "How?" he managed after struggling to find his voice.

Kurt sighed, a soft whistling sound that sent another cold breeze through the apartment. Blaine shivered and grabbed the blanket off the back of the couch to wrap it around his shoulders. "I don't really know," Kurt admitted. "All I know is I'm here somehow and I've been trying to talk to you in any way possible, but I haven't been able to until now. I don't know why, but now that I _can _talk to you, I don't know what to say."

Blaine stared at Kurt—was he a ghost?—and noticed that he was barely visible, his skin a sickly blue tint. "Kurt… I'm so sorry. I've wanted to tell you ever since… since…"

"I know," Kurt stopped him. Blaine wanted to reach out and touch him, pull him closer, but he was afraid he wouldn't be able to. "I know, but you don't have to apologize. I don't regret what happened that night and I never will. I saved your life by taking that last hit—"

"It was a _brick, _Kurt," Blaine emphasized.

"—and I wouldn't go back and change a thing even if I could."

"I would," Blaine said, tears filling his eyes. "I would have told you I loved you one last time before you were gone. But… I wouldn't change what happened to you, no matter how much I'm hurting now. Because then you'd be hurting and that would be even worse."

"Blaine," Kurt whispered, his tears finally falling as he reached for Blaine, pulling his hand back at the last second. "I'm so sorry, Blaine. I'm so sorry you're hurting. But I think I know why I'm here now. I'm supposed to tell you to move on. You need to let go before I can go… wherever it is I'm going."

"I thought you didn't believe in any of that," Blaine murmured.

"After all this? I'd be crazy not to. I mean, how else am I still here? And why? There has to be a reason."

"And what if I can't let go?" he asked brokenly.

"Blaine, you have to," Kurt insisted, heartbroken. "I know it hurts and I know you don't want me to go, but I need you to let go. I'm asking you to do this one last thing for me, okay? Let me go."

Blaine broke down, shaking his head and crying relentlessly. "I can't… I'm sorry. I can't… I need you, Kurt. I'm sorry…"

Kurt moved quickly to sit down beside Blaine and Blaine shivered, feeling cold again. But he moved closer to Kurt. He put his head next to where Kurt's heart would be and he saw a warm, pinkish glow flicker and spread throughout Kurt's chest. He pulled away slightly and the light faded, making Blaine's heart sink. He looked at Kurt who was, in actuality, nothing but a blue aura taking the shape of the man Blaine loved—loves.

"We're still connected," Kurt said softly. "After so many years, of course we are. That's why I need you to do this for me. I need you to let me go, Blaine." He tentatively put his hand up to Blaine's face, leaving nothing but the feeling of a frosty breeze against Blaine's cheek. He wished he could wipe away Blaine's tears.

"Kurt…" Blaine stared at Kurt's face, getting one good look at him before he said anything else that would make this more final. He couldn't keep Kurt here for his own selfish reasons. He needed to do this for Kurt; he needed to let go. Kurt belonged somewhere else; somewhere beautiful; somewhere that Blaine could join him someday. It was that thought that gave him the last bit of courage to say what he needed to. "I'm letting you go," he whispered and the warm light in Kurt's chest flared up again, spreading even beyond the space around his heart. Kurt's entire being began to glow. "I love you, Kurt. So much. I'll never forget you, but I'm letting you go."

Kurt's smile grew soft, a mixture of sad and relieved. "I'm never saying goodbye to you," he whispered.

The words echoed in his head long after Kurt's light reached its peak and then quickly dimmed to reveal empty space. No, he would never say goodbye to Kurt. But he could let go.


	2. Say Something

"Say Something"

It had been one year. Exactly one year since the night of Kurt's death—not that Blaine was counting, but how could he possibly forget? He had been managing, just barely, to move on with his life without Kurt there beside him. But some mornings he still woke up expecting to look over and see Kurt sleeping peacefully beside him. He never was.

Blaine refused to go with Rachel to the gravestone. He couldn't bear to go there unless he was by himself, and even then he could barely stop himself from collapsing and never getting up again.

He'd been getting better. He really had been. But it was _that _day and he couldn't take it.

He was searching through the cupboard, hoping to find some kind of comfort food that didn't remind him of Kurt, when he saw it. The box of cookies he'd bought a few days ago. Memories flooded his mind and he couldn't keep it in anymore. He fell to his knees in the middle of the kitchen, hugging his middle and sobbing.

Memories of promises to bake cookies twice a year. Memories of burnt cookies and smoke and seemingly ruined evenings. Memories of Kurt's laughter as he pulled the Plan B cookies out of the cupboard and heated some milk on the stove. Memories of laughing and smiling and watching old movies together and being so in love that it didn't matter if the cookies were stale or if the movie's jokes didn't make sense.

All of it was gone. And worst of all, at the heart of it, _Kurt _was gone.

He felt a pair of hands on his shoulders and he flinched, looking up to find Sam crouching behind him, worry written all over his face. "Blaine…"

"Get out," Blaine pleaded weakly. "I need to be alone."

"You really _shouldn't _be alone—"

"I said get _out_," Blaine snapped, glaring at his friend. He didn't have the energy at the moment to feel guilty.

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry," Sam said with a soft, resigned sigh. "I miss him, too," he said, voice cracking, before he left the loft.

_I know. You have no idea how much I know. _

He bolted clumsily to the piano in the corner of the room, finding at least some comfort in the familiar keys beneath his fingers. He started to play, tears already rushing down his face as he sang, raw and aching.

_Say something, I'm giving up on you_

_I'll be the one if you want me to_

_Anywhere I would have followed you_

_Say something, I'm giving up on you_

Sometimes he just wished he could see Kurt's face again. He wished he'd taken more time to commit every detail to memory. He wished he could hear his voice one more time. He wished he could _feel _him in something real and not just a memory.

_I… am feeling so small_

_It was over my head_

_I know nothing at all_

_Say something, I'm giving up on you_

_I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you_

_Anywhere I would have followed you_

_Say something I'm giving up on you_

If only he could have saved him. If only he'd been stronger. Why wasn't he stronger?

_I… will swallow my pride_

_You're the one that I love_

_And I'm saying goodbye_

_Say something, I'm giving up on you_

His voice was like a scream, pleading with every word for Kurt to hold him in his arms just one more time.

_I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you_

_And anywhere I would have followed you_

_Oh, oh, oh…_

_Say something, I'm giving up on you_

_Say something, I'm giving up on you_

_Say something…_

He sagged in defeat and a bit of relief at having gotten that out of his system.

He needed to accept that Kurt wasn't coming back. He knew it, of course, but that didn't mean he could entirely believe it. But he had to believe in something. He had to believe that he would see Kurt again one day. He had to.

For now, he would live on in Blaine's memories. And that would have to be enough.

**A/N: I'M HORRIBLE, I KNOW. But I had to write a sequel to this. I am truly sorry. This is dedicated to Merry-the-Cookie because we were drowning ourselves in feels and blangst and all that stuff. **

**Review please! **


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